What can you learn from dating that you can apply to your freelance writing career?
You may be surprised how closely related they are!
As the only married one in my group of friends, let’s just say I’ve sort of become the “go-to” person when it comes to dating advice.
Now I’m definitely not saying I’ve got all the answers, but I can tell you one thing—after providing countless pints of ice cream and listening to story after story of another bad match up, I’ve learned a LOT about the ins and outs of what it takes to survive in the dating world today. And let me tell you, it doesn’t sound easy!
From bad blind dates to email break ups, the world of dating is full of ups and downs! Hmm…sounds a lot like the world of freelance writing doesn’t it?
Well, last week after I had talked my girlfriend out of an all-time dating low, I found myself wondering, how did I actually do that?
Why do all my friends come to me for dating advice?
Why do they get such value out of it?
I’m married and I’ve been out of the dating game for so long. So why do I know so much about it? I’m a freelance writing expert, not a dating expert!
And then it hit me! All this great advice I have been giving my friends comes directly from my knowledge of the freelance writing world!
Sounds pretty crazy, right? But think about it! With a new client or a new relationship, we’re all looking for someone with long-term potential, right?
Or how about this one…when communicating with clients or dates, you don’t want to sound desperate. They can both smell desperation a mile away!
See what I mean? And there’s a lot more to learn where that came from.
So whether you’ve spent a lot of time in the dating world or you’re tied down and have just heard all the stories like me, I’m sure you’ll find this post interesting.
Today, I’m going to share with you 3 client-attracting techniques you can learn from dating. After reading it, I’m sure you’ll agree that every moment spent in the dating world is going to pay off. Literally!
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The First Impression.
Some might say a first impression is everything when it comes to dating. You want to look and feel your best. So typically you “dress to impress,” right?
I personally go to the grocery store in my sweat pants, but I have a friend who swears by the rule to never leave the house in anything you wouldn’t wear on a date. Now, while I do think that’s a bit over the top, I also see some value in it, especially if you compare it to the freelance writing world.
As freelance writers our first impressions are generally online through our website, blog, social profiles, and emails. So it’s crucial that we keep all of those things “dressed to the nines” at all times.
You never know who you might meet, or who might decide to check out your website. In other words, keep everything updated and pristine at all times. After all, there are a lot of fish in the sea who are ready to steal your bait, and if a client sees a grammar mistake in your email, a neglected blog, or an outdated website, you can kiss that opportunity goodbye!
If you need a little extra assistance getting your social profiles up and running, head over to my blog post “Quick Start Guide to Setting Up Your Writer Social Profiles.” This will ensure that your profiles have the “perfect look” for the perfect first impression.
And if you REALLY want to make a good first impression, LinkedIn is a good platform to use. You can learn exactly how to do this in my LinkedIn report. It’s free to download :). Get it here.
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Do You Meet The Requirements?
In the dating world, it’s all about finding out if you’re right for each other. And the same goes for a writer-client relationship.
Typically people go on a date with a mental checklist of the things they are looking for…
Are they respectful?
Do you have a good rapport with them?
Do they make you feel comfortable?
Are they paying attention to detail when getting to know you?
Well the same applies to freelance writing.
A client is looking for someone to fulfill his needs and if you get the gig, or a second date, you’re going to do your absolute best to meet their requirements, right?
Now while it’s important to fulfill the requirements, it’s even more important to be honest about your capabilities.
Similar to the dating world, TRUST is the key to keeping a writer-client relationship running smoothly. There’s nothing worse than going on a few dates, thinking you’ve found someone perfect, and then finding out it was all based on lies. The same applies to a client. If you accept an assignment based on certain skills you don’t have, and you get close to the deadline only to tell them you can’t complete it, you will lose that client forever. Be upfront and honest about your skills from the beginning, and you will gain trust from day one.
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It’s All in the Details
There’s no better feeling than when the person you’re dating surprises you with your favorite flowers, or takes you to your favorite restaurant.
This tells you two things:
- They listen to you.
- They care about you.
Now, there’s nothing worse than when a writer doesn’t read the assignment thoroughly and as a result, doesn’t complete the job correctly. This is freelance client management at its worst.
This tells the client that you are too busy, and you’re not giving their assignment top priority. The same goes for a job ad. If you can reply to a job ad and list again the detailed requirements you possess that are in the job ad, you will impress that prospective client all the way to the bank!
A tip to achieving success with this is to always read an assignment twice through. As writers, our eyes are responsible for reading and writing all day long so it’s pretty much guaranteed that we will accidentally miss a word here or there. The key is to not let that word cause you to misread an assignment. Pay close attention to details and you will be sure to impress your client (and your date) every time.
So, the next time you have a bad dating experience don’t be too quick to write it off as another waste of your time. Instead, think about what freelance writing lessons you can take from it.
Today I gave you the top three techniques I find to be the most useful, but I know there’s plenty more where that came from. Something to remember when attempting to attract clients, and dates for that matter, is that it goes both ways. Yes, you’re trying to attract what you want, and to do that you’re putting the best version of yourself out there. But every now and then it’s important to stop, reflect and ask yourself…
“Am I attracting the right clients?”
“Am I attracting what is best for me?”
Getting The Right Clients is one of my five pillars to freelance writing success. Similar to the person you’re dating, the right client will value what you have to offer. So when searching for your next client or your next date, remember to put yourself out there.
“Flirt” with comments and posts.
“Woo” them with your perfect grammar and spelling.
When it comes time to commit, don’t settle for anything less than you deserve!
Img Credit: Walk. A couple holding hands. (Free photobank www.tOrange.us) / CC BY 4.0









Wow Maggie, what a wonderful analogy! I had never thought about it before, but when you break it down they ARE alike.